Anya takes a trip to the hospital tomorrow morning. She will be getting her tongue clipped, which will be a fairly painless procedure, and should help her avoid tongue-induced social awkwardness (”Why can’t you eat an ice cream cone?”) and speech impediments down the line.

It’s a 30-second procedure, but it’s still surgery. She will be put in a little baby hospital gown, and she will be put under anesthesia for about a minute.

There’s no recovery; she’s good to go the second she wakes up. Her parents should be good to go several hours later, when their hearts slow down a bit.